Thursday, May 19, 2011
Omaha, NB 5/15/11
Is NB even the abbreviation for Nebraska? I’m to lazy to Google it, so it is now, whether you like it or not. Okay then. Since the last time we caught up a lot of stuff went down so I’ll try to fire through this as quick as possible as to not bore the wholly living snot out of ya’.
They say you learn something new everyday and while I’m not exactly sure who “they” are, Omaha and the day after did teach me a whole slew of new crap. Some of which I will never forget. For starters, after a few shots my idea of what my doppelganger looks like is just a bit skewed.
It looks like one of those before and after “faces of meth” billboards. If you’re reading this, I’m sorry I said we looked alike, hopefully you didn’t go home, draw a hot bath and open a couple veins.
I should have know by Aaron’s reaction.
Next up, if a girl that looks like this…
…walks up, buys a record and is super cool to you straight off the bat, see if you can stay at her house. Chances are she has a super rad apartment, a fridge full of awesome food and a record collection that will knock your socks off. She will also have a store filled with cool shit as well. (Thanks Sarah!)
But the single most important thing I learned is that if you have a day off in between Omaha and Memphis, and you happen to stay at a Holiday Inn in Festus, Missouri do not leave a backpack containing your MacBook pro, Canon G9, the tour book with all the details and contracts for the entire tour, your phone charger and toothbrush sitting on the sidewalk. But if you do decide to do that, make sure that you are not three hours away before you realize what you’ve done. That is, of course, your goal is to get all George “The Animal” Steele on one of the van seats, then curl up into a ball on the floor and cry.
If you’re lucky enough that a jewelry salesman spots it and turns it in to the front desk, it’s still going to cost you $133.00 to get it shipped over night, which is waaaaaay better than loosing all my porn, wait, I mean, uh, important business files.
Tour To Live!