Spokane, Wa. 5/12/11

Hello there Internet homeslices, it seems like only yesterday I was figuring out different ways to complain about driving. Now we’re back at it again, but this time around everything is different. How you ask?

Well maybe you’ve heard of a little record called Murder The Mountains? That’s right that sucker has sold so many copies it’s been certified triple balsa! Gone are the days of slumming around the countryside in a van sharing the roadways with the commoners, we’re taking to the air. And we aren’t flying coach either, we bought Wonder Woman’s invisible jet—then had it dipped in space gold. Oh, and did I mention that the plane is completely staffed by Brazilian supermodels wearing nothing but bikinis made of fruit roll ups?

I just wanted to let you know because gone are the days of approachable, every day Joe, drinking buddies Red Fang. Nowadays to even buy a t-shirt you’re going to have to talk to my agent. Get used to the sight of this:
Because we always have somewhere cooler to be like, you know, uhhh, shit what’s cool? Applebee’s? Or Wait, umm, Senor McGillacutty’s? Dammit. Whatever, you get my point.

So, uh, yeah.

You’re welcome.

—Coyle

Tour To Live!

P.S. On a semi-serious note: If you haven’t seen the NEW video click here. We can’t say thank you enough to Whitey for all the hard work he put into yet another mind-blowing video. Thanks a ton White Dude, you fucking rule and we are forever in your debt. If you ever need anything from us please feel free to ask. Except for manual labor. We don’t do that.