Friday, March 13, 2009

Finally found some WiFi

Cleveland, Ohio 3/07/09
We had a some time to kill so Bryan cleaned up a little before the show:
Soon as we got out of the van I knew we were near the college, it might have had something to do with the two nineteen-year-old kids in front of the Chipotle jammin' out on a flute and a guitar. There was no tip jar or open guitar case, they were just throwin' out some jams for the burrito loving public. Man, the things you think will get you laid at nineteen, huh?

Richmond, Virginia 3/08/09
Let's not pull any punches here, expectations were not high for this show. It was in a sushi bar, on a wednesday, and rumor had it that all the kids had left town for spring break. But, as has been the case lately, it turned out to be a rocker.

We showed up to six different plates of sushi all about this size:
Then RPG played:
They completely tore the roof off the place. They were so tight that it was unbelievable. Not in the “You see the new spoiler on my Honda civic?” “Yeah Dog, that shit's tight.” sense of the word, but the “Holy crap, they just nailed everyone of those songs so well my brain's about to splode!”type of tight. I've said it before, if RPG doesn't make you want to pump your fist in the air, you better check for a pulse.

Charlotte, North Carolina 3/09/09
Wow, I don't even know where to start on this one... Alright, lets just say the lead singer from the opening band was, um, sorta like a puppy someone had fed a chocolate bar to. Real nice, nothing but good intentions, but bouncing off the walls and leaving a trail of shit in his path. By the time Early Man started he was so excited I thought his head was going to implode onto it's self. It took all of about three seconds of Early Man's set for him to try to start a mosh pit with the other nine people watching the show, leaving seven people standing in a large half circle while he and a couple buddies ran around . Now, I missed what happened, but all the sudden a noise rung through the bar that was similar to a ripe melon being dropped from a three story parking garage. For real. Mike said they heard and felt it on stage— while they were playing. The next thing I know his friends are trying to help him off the ground while blood is pouring from his head, he shoos them off, trying to stand on his own and goes right back down onto his face again.
We all thought that they must have rushed him to the hospital, because that's what normal people would do for a friend with a small plasma geyser in the middle of their forehead, but noooo. They just propped him up on the back porch, let him puke all over the place and kept drinking. He was still there when we loaded up at the end of the night and his buddies promised us that they were going to take him to the ER “...After [they got] some burgers.”
The next morning while staying at our good friend Gus's house he filled us in that his friend, Jake, left the bar after us, only to find that the “getting burgers” meant just leaving him there to die. Jake gave him a ride to the ER where they discovered that he was leaking brain fluid or someshit. I hope that guy gets better real soon and when he does, he punches everyone of those guys that left him right in the ball bag.

So to summarize: When Early Man plays first this happens:
Then this happens:

Asheville, North Carolina 3/10/09
What, you want me to beat that story the next night?


Tour To Live!


  1. gus here..
    i can report that last night at the Milestone in Charlotte i was told that the guy who busted his head open DID finally get treatment: Here's what he now has: multiple stitches, concussion, broken nose, and black eyes. I was told he is ALLGOOD. Thanks for coming to CLT and staying at my crib. Door is open anytime.

  2. Damn, dude. That's terrifying.

  3. The head thing grossed me out. Stellar blog posting, I've been reading the whole time. Gonna try to make it to PDX on the 3rd. Keep on keepin' on!

  4. Yo guys. sound man posting here...
    Scoggins was his name, from the band Boo Low outta Spartenburg SC, He kept saying he was ALLGOOD and I didn't buy it. But the FACT is he never got medical treatment, or stitches... he texted me just now that he only got more manly! He's manages down at a big club down there called Ground Zero, check it out, they party hard. He does have a 3 inch gash on his forehead, a broke ass nose, two black eyes and most likely a decent concussion. Killer show, thanks again.

  5. YO! It was wicked meeting you guys in good old Steamin' Cleveland! I'm rockin' the beer coozie at work right now. Good Luck with the baby Aaron.

  6. If you take the word "the" out of Olie007's comment, it makes the sentence way more awesome.
    Nub nus.