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A Bunch Of Places!

All right we got a lot of ground to cover so I’m going to keep this short and sweet. You ready for an optical beer-bong of awesomeness? Then let’s do this.

West Chester, PA. 11/16/09


The boys played at The Note, which besides being owned by Bam Margera is also home to The Glutton, which is the burger of your choice that, instead of buns, has two grilled cheese. John dropped in:


Now as I said earlier, the club was owned by Bam and anyone who has watched the show Viva La Bam knows that it’s made up of a cast of guys from his hometown, one of them being Ryan Dunn. Ryan turned out to be one of the nicest guys on the planet. No joke. He’s the kind of dude that skips the handshake and goes right in for the hug, and means it. After about ten minutes of hanging out he invited both bands to crash at his house.

We walked in the door and we wouldn’t let us make it past the kitchen without taking shots of this:

“Old plum brandy” Not even plum brandy but “Old” plum brandy. Aaron liked it.


Then he gave us a tour of his amazing house, ending in the basement where this was waiting for us:


It didn’t take long for Bryan and Herbie to get the bumpers in motion:
Thanks again to Ryan, not too many people would let ten hair-farming, smelling-like-a-beer-drenched-dog dudes into their reeeeeeeaaaaaallllly nice house. I’m not sure if there is anyone that would let a guy that hasn’t seen the inside of a shower curtain for a week sleep on their Italian leather couch. Thanks.



New York, New York 11/17/09



The GPS freaked out on the way in the city so Glowbra took over and guided us directly to the club:

Which, keeping with the trend of playing celebrities owned clubs, was owned by Andrew W.K.

I took off to go have lunch with my Dad while the boys did an interview for Hightimes with our new homies Zena and Justina:

Things got so stoney during the interview that time completely stopped for Bryan:

Our good friends John and Angelica brought us out on the town after the show:

Benny had sticker shock when he saw the price of a beer costs in Manhattan:

Last call came a couple minutes too late for James:

Woke up with just enough time to grab a slice of pizza and head to Philly.



Philadelphia, PA 11/18/09


Listen, I think we can be honest with each other at this point, so I won’t sugar coat the fact that I was so hung over after New York that Philly was an exercise in not ripping my own eyeballs out, throwing them on the ground, puking on them, lying down on the whole mess and sobbing hysterically. It was the kind of hangover where it feels like everyone is looking at you like this:

I was seeing leprechauns:

Let’s put it this way, if my brain is usually The Taj Mahal, when we got to Philly it was more like this:
It goes without saying that you’re not getting much outta this entry.


Baltimore, Maryland 11/19/09

When we first rolled in to town I thought we were on the set from Batman:
Doesn’t it look like The Penguin is going to jump out and put a cane in your face that spews some crazy knock out gas? Luckily that was not the case. There were just a handful of homeless dudes asking for change.

Can anyone tell me why all the spangers have an ID card in Baltimore? Do they have to get a license? Take some sort of test? “If a man and woman are walking eastbound at three miles an hour and you’re three blocks away walking south-by-southeast at four miles an hour, how long will it take until you make them feel uncomfortable?”

I went for a walk and the boys ordered in some Thai food. Not to long after eating, Bryan starting saying he wasn’t feeling so hot, then about an hour later, in the middle of Bird On Fire, hair exploded from Bryan’s face!

Tyler had never seen anything like it like it before:
Luckily, David had been a medic during the Hair Wars of ’87 and knew that the only chance of saving him was to fight back with heavily concentrated riffs at Bryan’s face.

And Just Like that all the hair sucked back into Bryan’s head.
No Biggie, just another day in the life of Red Fang.

—Coyle

Tour To Live!

Comments

  1. Coyle, you are a king among bitches. King of the bitches, bitches. Keep bringing the LOLs brotherman. always a pleasure reading up on the adventures of Red Fang.

    50% rock, 50% roll

    -john strange

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