If you’re following the blog you’ll know that the last show was in Seattle, so we had a big drive ahead of us. That was nothing new for this tour by this point we had gotten used to life in the van. We’d adapted a whole new skill set that would have even the world's top scientists scurrying to get their clipboards. It’s like some Jane Goodall shit. For example John has what we refer to in the van as “a gerbil bladder” which means that even the sight of more than three ounces of water gets him holding his crotch and jumping up and down like a six year old. But he’s figured away past that by always having a few empty Gatorade bottles in the van to fill up:
Important tip: Always mark the pee bottles. After a few weeks of malnourishment your pee can be confused with most Gatorade. In color and taste.
I know I make a lot of jokes about farts but the sad fact is that when most of your food comes from truck stops there is times when the van sounds like the horn section from the Boston Philharmonic warming up. And while this makes for great blog fodder, it sucks in real life because we spend a good fifty-percent of the day with the windows rolled down. The suck factor doubles when it’s thirty-four degrees and raining but Aaron has figured out a way to sneak a cheek and save us from the elements.
Now if we can just figure out how refuel on the go like a fighter jet we’ll be all set.
—Coyle
Tour To Live!
Important tip: Always mark the pee bottles. After a few weeks of malnourishment your pee can be confused with most Gatorade. In color and taste.
I know I make a lot of jokes about farts but the sad fact is that when most of your food comes from truck stops there is times when the van sounds like the horn section from the Boston Philharmonic warming up. And while this makes for great blog fodder, it sucks in real life because we spend a good fifty-percent of the day with the windows rolled down. The suck factor doubles when it’s thirty-four degrees and raining but Aaron has figured out a way to sneak a cheek and save us from the elements.
Now if we can just figure out how refuel on the go like a fighter jet we’ll be all set.
—Coyle
Tour To Live!
You are disgusting pigs.
ReplyDeleteAaron is wearing jeans.
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